Packing my suitcases after my winter break to return to school stirred many different emotions within me. Being home reminded me of how much I missed the culture and environment I’d been familiar with all my life, and I was sad thinking of having to let it go again. It was natural to feel homesick, and I understood that bottling up these strong emotions would hurt me rather than help me. By focusing on what I was missing, I forgot to appreciate what I had at Wellesley: new opportunities, friends, classmates, and professors who provided support and reminded me of why I decided to attend a university so far from home – to pursue my passion for film. I’m really excited to see what this semester holds, knowing now how much of a difference it makes to prioritize the things that make you happy.
During my first semester, I became distracted and consumed by assignments and work, often having little to no time to care for myself. Most days, I wouldn’t even have time to call home. One week in particular, I had felt my lowest because I had gone several days without hearing from my family. Luckily, my twin sister, Estrella, came to visit me for Thanksgiving break. I enjoyed introducing her to my friends, eating with her in the dining hall, and walking across the Charles River together. It was like I had home with me again. When she left, it reminded me just how much I was really struggling; I missed her presence dearly. Going to a different school, especially one so far away, wasn’t as easy as I expected. It meant learning to do things on my own and finding myself in this new environment.
It’s a beautiful problem to have, being in a college environment where the possibilities are endless. That’s what keeps me going. There are moments when I feel disconnected from certain parts of my school community because of the financial and educational advantages other students possess. It becomes really easy to feel out of place when there are not that many around who look like you, and you think you stick out like a sore thumb. The lack of my culture around me made me want to connect with it more. So I joined the Latinx organization at school called Mezcla. At their meetings, they would have scrumptious food and blast familiar music. It helped me miss home a little less. My film professor reassures me that it’s okay to feel sad and burned out as she constantly reminds me to take care of myself. I take my medicine, eat my vegetables, and listen to music when I feel overwhelmed. I’m starting to think she also means to take care of my dreams and to not forget them.
College life gets busy, but I should prioritize myself and my happiness because my time at Wellesley is not running out. I have time, and I can make time. Taking small actions like listening to my professor’s encouraging words, or continuing to seek out organizations that interest me, will help me remember where I come from and what I love. I’ve started to call home more often. Calling them makes the thousands of miles apart feel like none at all. It’s easy to forget who you are or what your goals represent when life and school start to feel overbearing, but I’ve gotten this far because of all the passions and people I love. People are what help keep you grounded, but it’s passions that motivate you to not give up.
